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(continued)
Havdalah must be performed in the following two manners:
1. Havdalah prayer—a special prayer is added to the fourth blessing of the Amidah in the Saturday evening Maariv prayers. This prayer acknowledges the separation between the Shabbat and the upcoming weekdays, and entreats G-d to grant us a spiritually wholesome week. Women or others who did not pray maariv, should say, “Baruch Hamavdil bayn kodesh l'chol”—“Blessed be He who separates between [the] holiness [of Shabbat] and the mundane [weekdays].” Before reciting one of the above, one should not perform any of the labors that were forbidden on Shabbat.1
It is customary to overfill the cup so that some will spill over as a “good sign” for the new week: “My cup overfloweth”
i. wine—a blessing is recited over a cup of wine or grape juice3 which is then drunk by the person who recited havdalah upon the conclusion of the service. The cup must contain at least 2.9 fl. ounces. It is customary to overfill the cup so that some will spill over as a “good sign” for the new week: “My cup overfloweth.”
ii. spices—a blessing is recited over spices such as cloves or cinnamon (some use myrtle leaves from the Four Species) which are then smelled by all. This is to calm the soul since it is saddened at having lost an “extra soul” which was added to it during Shabbat and which departs on Saturday night.
iii. flame—a blessing is recited over a flame lit especially for havdalah. The reason for the flame is that fire was first created on Saturday night when Adam hit together two stones (a supernatural divine light illuminated the world during the first week of Creation). Fire is also being “recreated” on Saturday night, since kindling a flame was forbidden on Shabbat. Ideally, the flame should be comprised of at least two conjoined flames. In your local Judaica store you will find a selection of beautiful multi-wicked havdalah candles, but one may even use matches whose flames are held to combine into one. It is customary to gaze at one’s fingernails in the light of the flame after reciting/hearing the blessing on it.
Here's a brief description of the ceremony:
Recite the first paragraph and the blessing on the wine. Pass the cup to your other hand, lift up the spice box and recite the blessing on the spices. Put the spice box down. Return the cup to the first hand and recite the blessing on the candle(s). Fold the fingers of your other hand over their thumb and, with your palm up, hold the bent fingertips to the flame so the light glints off the nails. Pass the cup to your other hand and do the finger thing for the first hand. Then, return the cup to the first hand. Recite the final paragraph. Drink most of the cup’s contents, hold the candle(s) under the cup and pour the rest over the candles to extinguish them. Recite the after-blessing. Have a great week!
Most of the above rules also apply for Jewish holidays... though the holiday havdalah does not include spices or a flame
A few more laws concerning havdalah:
• Starting from sunset of Saturday evening, until the havdalah service, one should not eat or drink (water is permitted).4
• One who cannot obtain spices and/or a flame, should recite havdalah over wine, omitting the blessing(s) over the item(s) he is lacking.
• At least 1.46 ounces must be drunk from the havdalah cup. After drinking the havdalah, the one who drank must recite the appropriate after-blessing.
• One who forgot or did not recite havdalah on Saturday night, may do so anytime through Tuesday afternoon, and should not eat until doing so. After Tuesday, he may not say havdalah (though he may eat). If making havdalah after Saturday night, one should omit the spices and flame and their blessings.
• Most of the above rules also apply for when a Jewish holiday ends anytime during the week. Havdalah verses are also recited in the maariv evening prayers (or ''Baruch Hamavdil bayn kodesh l'chol' must be recited), and there is a havdalah service, though the service does not include spices or a flame.
Footnotes
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