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Does real love exist?

by Rabbi Shlomo Chein

  

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Question:

Hi, I’m a 15 years old girl and I’ve got a weird question, but it really bothers me. Does “real love” exist? The kind of love that when you see that special man you feel roller coasters in the stomach; that whenever you touch him, you feel tremors; the kind of love you read about in books; the kind of love where you are absolutely certain that you want to be with that person forever. Does this kind of love exist?


Answer:

What you describe in your description, is not what you ask in your question. Real love does exist. But it is not roller coasters in your stomach. Roller coasters in your stomach etc., is lust, or the excitement associated with something new, or just beyond your grasp.

Real love is when you had a bad day, you are tired, you are hungry, and your head hurts, yet you are still willing to run an errand for your beloved
Real love is willing to sacrifice your own needs for the benefit of your beloved. Not just in a passionate lustful moment, but every moment of every day for the rest of your life.

Real love is when you had a bad day, you are tired, you are hungry, and your head hurts, yet you are still willing to run an errand for your beloved. Not only that, but running that errand makes you feel better.

This is the love a husband should have for his wife and vice versa, and this is the love a Jew should have for G-d. To do a Mitzvah because it makes us feel good is akin to lust or the excitement of something new and just beyond our grasp.

Real love for G-d is the willingness to sacrifice your own needs for the benefit of your G-dly mission. Not just in a passionate inspirational moment, but every moment of every day for the rest of your life.

Real love is when you had a bad day, you are tired, you are hungry, and your head hurts, yet you are still willing to do fulfill a commandment from G-d. Not only that, but fulfilling that commandment makes you feel better.

And yes, real love is possible.


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RELATED CATEGORIES

Life Cycle » Marriage » Married Life

Mitzvah
(pl. Mitzvot). A commandment from G-d. Mitzvah also means a connection, for a Jew connects with G–d through fulfilling His commandments.
G-d
It is forbidden to erase or deface the name of G-d. It is therefore customary to insert a dash in middle of G-d's name, allowing us to erase or discard the paper it is written on if necessary.