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Pre-marital sex will make me happy. Why shouldn't I?

by Rabbi Shlomo Chein


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Hi, I live in Greece. Jewish life here is somewhat non-existent in the way I suppose it is in Israel, but in my daily life I try to abide by some rules my family taught me. Somehow I am not very happy, and I believe this is because of a lack of intimacy.
I would like to ask your opinion on pre-marital sex, is it bad? I’m told that suppressing sexual needs is also not good. What do you think? What do you do when you know something will make you happier but you don’t know whether it’s right or wrong in the broader sense?

I believe the manufacturer of a product knows his product best... I believe that G-d, as the creator of human beings, knows human beings best

I believe the manufacturer of a product knows his product best.

I believe that G-d, as the creator of human beings, knows human beings best.

I therefore believe the best (and perhaps only) way to happiness is following G-d’s instructions for how to live.

G-d instructed us to find a spouse, and then have sex.

That is the surest road to happiness.

You might argue that sex without marriage will make you happy? Sure, and many people argue that fatty foods or drugs make them happy! I don’t need to tell you that these indulgences do not bring real happiness as is evident from the devastating and depressing outcomes these so called “happy” things lead to. Just take one look at society today, a society which thinks they can use sex whenever they want in order to make them happy, and you will see how “depressed” and unhappy society is with sex and with life in general.

You can read more about this on the following link from our database: Is a Diamond a Stone?

You should also locate and visit the local Chabad Center in Greece ( You will feel more at home, more at ease, and much happier. Don’t forget to tell them you were referred by Askmoses.


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Chabad, an acronym for Wisdom, Knowledge, and Understanding, is the name of a Chassidic Group founded in the 1770s. Two of the most fundamental teachings of Chabad are the intellectual pursuit of understanding the divine and the willingness to help every Jew who has a spiritual or material need.
It is forbidden to erase or deface the name of G-d. It is therefore customary to insert a dash in middle of G-d's name, allowing us to erase or discard the paper it is written on if necessary.