His family was never religious back in Israel. He told me that growing up on the kibbutz, the only way he knew it was Yom Kippur was by the absence of other cars on the highway as he made his way to the beach. When he got here he drifted into friendships with other Jews more out of social convenience than fidelity to tradition. He brissed and bar Mitzvah’d his kids to please his in-laws, but that was about as far as Judaism went in his life.

But you reach a certain age and you start to wonder. He wasn’t actively searching, but by the time I started popping in he had unbent enough to be willing to engage me in conversation about Life, the Universe and Everything. Took another six months before he felt comfortable with Tefillin, but by now he does that too, and enjoys it.

Last week I overreached. He’d fallen into a routine; strapping on, saying the first chapter of Shma and then strapping off. A five-minute diversion from his working day and he feels good for the rest of the week. This time he was on a roll and started reciting the second paragraph as well.

As a native Hebrew speaker he understood what he was saying. He stopped short, backtracked, confirmed that which he thought he’d read and then handed back the Siddur. He didn’t like the notion of threats and warning that are enumerated in the section.

It is not unreasonable to point out that for every action there must be a reaction.

Paraphrased, this is the substance of the second chapter of Shma, but it didn’t work for him. He’d been brought up to believe that you should do the right thing for no other reason than knowing it is right. Over time he had independently been attracted to authentic Judaism, but suddenly couldn’t stomach the threats implicit in the text. This was the first time he’d realised that a stick accompanies the carrots of our faith.

The Rambam asks the same question. It is indeed somewhat childish to act out of fear. In a perfect system we would accept morality on her own terms and pursue truth and justice out of conviction, rather than anxiety. Warnings of future punishments, according to the Rambam, are directed at those too immature to appreciate G-d on His terms, and who have to be chivied back into line by pointing out the consequences of their actions.

And indeed consequences they are. It is not unreasonable to point out that for every action there must be a reaction. Dive off a roof headfirst and the consequences are potentially injurious. Forewarning someone about a potential danger lurking should not be taken as a threat, just wise counsel. The Torah points out the rewards and punishments available when we opt on to Hashem’s value system in the hope that we’ll accept the urging and get serious.

I’m not threatened

The Chidushe Harim of Ger was challenged by an alternative problem. Whereas my friend took the text almost too seriously, repelled by the concept of Hashem threatening retribution, the Gerrer Rebbe once met a scoffer pushing another agenda.

“Rabbi, I can prove that the Torah is false. The second paragraph of Shma foretells terrible punishments were one to deviate from the ways of righteousness. I have broken every available precept for decades now, and I have a wonderful live, blessed with financial success, good health and a happy family.”

The Rebbe responded: “The fact that you can ask such a question implies at the very least that you have once read through the words of shma?"

“Of course Rabbi, even a sinner like myself has visited a Synagogue and prayed once or twice.”

“Then I’ll have you know, that whatever you have received in life till now is inadequate. Our G-d is so forgiving and generous that saying the shma even once, entitles you to rewards and happiness beyond even your wildest dreams.