How can I be gracious with all the mental and emotional strains I have?

by Rabbi Moshe Miller

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I certainly sympathize with your difficulties, especially in view of the fact that you are bothered by the impact it may have on others.

Since you do not mention any details as to the cause(s) of your mental and emotional strain, I will have to suffice with some general observations.

Everything that happens is by Divine Providence, and situations that are beyond your control must be viewed as occurring in order to raise you up to a greater level of sanctity and emotional wisdom – just like a boat rises with the tide.

Nevertheless, if the situation you are in can be changed, you should make every effort to do so, either by changing your environment, or by changing your attitude to your difficulties. A positive mindset often alleviates stress.

Keep in mind too the dictum that “the heart (emotions) follows one’s actions.” In other words, act with graciousness to the extent that you can, even though you do not feel it, and it will become easier to feel it truly with every gracious act you perform.

You may also find the following link useful: http://www.chabad.org/dailystudy/tanya.asp?tDate=10/17/2005&Lang

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