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Is it ever OK to be sad or depressed?

by Mrs. Dinka Kumer

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First, there is a difference between 'sadness' and 'depression'. Sadness is due to some cause. 'I feel sad because of...'. Depression is a internally generated frame of mind which in most cases is not due to any one cause, though a person may tend to blame external factors. He is depressed just because. Sadness is generally forbidden, and depression always is. Both lead a person to a lack of enthusiasm for spirituality, and often cause him to sin.

There are times when a person should and must feel sad, though. For example, during a time of mourning, a person is expected to feel sad. It is a spiritual and natural process in which a person gradually leaves the state of mourning. Interestingly, a person in mourning is exempt from certain Jewish observances specifically because of his sad state. He cannot be expected to fulfill those observances with the proper amount of joy, and therefore, he need not do them at all. Another appropriate time for sadness is when a sin has caused one to become distanced from G-d. This gap arouses within the person sadness and remorse and the motivation to want to draw close to G-d once again. This sadness is nevertheless limited to certain times during our daily prayers, before going to sleep at night, and days like Yom Kippur. What is common to situations of proper sadness is that they lead to a subsequent spiritual ascent. With mourning, a person gradually ascends from a difficult moment to life with renewed faith and enhanced commitment. After remorse over a sin, a person comes closer to G-d, even more so than before his sin. The sadness has a purpose in eventually improving a person's spiritual situation.

Depression is a downward cycle bringing a person deeper and deeper into a spiritual wasteland

On the other hand, depression is a downward cycle bringing a person deeper and deeper into a spiritual wasteland. To escape real depression a person often needs professional assistance and spiritual guidance.

Sadness regarding one's material standing, or at inappropriate times even about spiritual matters, may be shorter term than depression, but are spiritually harmful as well. Also, these kinds of sadness can become habit forming, making bouts more frequent and the spiritual descent greater. The best solution for sadness is a determined decision to ignore its calls and an immediate mental injection of positive thinking.

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Sadness & depression

Posted by: Anonymous on Mar 26, 2005

If sadness and depression generally draw a person away from spirituality, then what does that say, perhaps, of the clinically depressed - with a medical condition because of biology and circumstances? Are these people separated from closer relationship with G-d?

Many of the prophets were depressed because of the weight of their calling, a yearning for the hearts of the people, and the struggle seeking G-d. This enhanced their ministry: in these darker times they experienced the comforting power of G-d, and learnt to be strong. If we don't become stuck in it, can this not be seen as a wonderful opportunity, rather than a hinderance?

We are not supposed to live in a state of pain and sadness, but reality is that some things will make life seem dark. This is normal, and repressing it in the name of religion will only make the problem worse. Perhaps we should face the truth of our emotions, and realise the miracle of the joy of the L-rd without being afraid of genuine sadness.

Editor's Comment

1. People who are clinically depressed must be treated for their illness in order to be able to serve G-d properly and joyfully. This is akin to someone who has a wound on his hand which prevents him from donning tefillin; obviously he must endeavor to rid himself of the wound so that he can continue fulfilling the mitzvah of tefillin.

2. There is a difference between depression and earnestness. The prophets were earnest and soberly somber, realizing the importance of their mission. This did not impede their joyful service of their Creator.

3. Once again we go down the path of "religion attempts to suppress natural instincts and feelings," and once again we must plead guilty as charged. G-d put us on this world to control our impulses and feelings, not to be dominated by them! See I have a problem with Torah law since it restricts man from doing things that are natural.

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